Sergio Garcia is a professional golfer on the US PGA Tour. He is also confoundingly stupid. Though he is a skilled golfer, his game is not what thrust him into the national spotlight. First, it was Sergio’s assertion that Woods had cheated in executing an improper drop on the way to his Players Championships win. Not a big deal, but notable in light of the rules. Good luck getting that enforced though, Sergio. It’s like calling Jordan for a foul because he pushed his defender out of the way en route to hitting a championship winning shot.
The other time Sergio got himself in the new was this past Tuesday night, less than two weeks later. At a European Tour Awards dinner someone asked him if he’d have Tiger over for dinner. That’s when Sergio put his dumbass lips to a microphone and said that he’d serve Tiger some fried chicken. That, to say in short, was a stupid thing to say. To say in long…
1. Everyone loves fried chicken
Fried chicken though heavily attributed to American Blacks is a food dish that originated nearly 1500 years ago. In Europe. Black folks seem to have been heavily linked to the consumption of fried chicken during slavery in the American South starting in the 1700’s. But who knows how that happened? Both whites and blacks in the South are attributed to eating vast quantities of yardbird.
And, if we’re really being honest, American Blacks have a lot of purchasing power, but KFC and Popeye’s ain’t just in the hood. They flourish in the suburbs as well, right next to Taco Bell and Burger King.
2. We already assumed he was a racist
Golf is played on public courses, but it truly thrives in the hands of the wealthy through the country club. Golf is expensive as hell. Keeping acres of land in pristine condition so men and women in pleated slacks and polo shirts can carve it up with metal sticks costs a pretty penny. So do the maintenance fees and membership dues of the best courses.
The country club environment has created a natural barrier to entry for many minorities since membership is privately run and must be approved by the members (read: wealthy white men). So money, alone, doesn’t allow for entrance to the best courses, status factors in as well. And no matter how many well-meaning white folks you have there is always at least one quiet-ass racist waiting to gather their buddies together and down-vote ‘questionable’ membership applications.
Sergio grew up in Spain learning golf from his dad, a club golf pro. He grew up in this sort of environment from the age of 3. Racism may exist in America, but it for damn sure didn’t originate here. And Spain was heavily involved in the slaving and trading of African slaves for centuries. But they were probably very respectful of their slaves though.
3. Racism isn’t in vogue anymore
Lebron James and Kobe Bryant are two of the most famous athletes in the world. Hockey and baseball are mainly white sports and the idea of the ‘All-American’ quarterback still rests with mostly pink faces in the NFL. Yet, in the US and abroad Lebron and Kobe are as well-known as McDonalds and Hollywood.
Black faces are running, dunking, throwing, catching and winning their way into the hearts and minds of white and non-white children everywhere. Hating them for their skin color is just lazy and ignorant, now more than it’s ever been. Nevermind that the President Of The United States is black either. It’s just an antiquated way of thinking ignorant of the socio-economic realities of poor minorities in the US and other countries as well. Racism has no place in intellectual groupthink, even if you have money.
4. Tiger is more Asian than Black
He sure the hell is Asian. His mom is Thai, Chinese and Dutch. His dad is Black, Native American and potentially Chinese. There’s more Asian in Tiger Woods than in a fortune cookie factory. That said, Sergio’s joking assertion that Tiger would like some fried chicken is still mostly correct since Asians and Blacks definitely have that in common. Sergio is still exceedingly stupid though.
5. Sergio wasn’t the first one to say racist stuff about Tiger
Fuzzy Zoeller beat Sergio to the ‘fried chicken’ punch sixteen years ago. Fuzzy was classy enough to include watermelon though since everyone knows you need a fruit or vegetable with your protein. Dick.
Oh, and don’t forget that Golf Channel chick that said Tiger’s competitors should ‘lynch him in a back alley.’ What did Tiger do to deserve all this racially based commenting at his expense? Win a lot. And bang white porn chicks. Maybe you can see their point under those circumstances. Wait, you can’t? Good.
6. Sergio ain’t on Tiger’s level
In hiphop the old adage is that you don’t diss down, you diss up. That is to say, you go after the ones you can gain recognition through via their acknowledgement. Sergio has won some tournaments, made some money and distinguished himself. But Sergio is not a worldwide brand like Tiger is. Hell, Sergio’s never even held the #1 spot. He got to #2 once, close enough to sniff Tiger’s undercarriage, but only briefly. If he was going to mess with Tiger, he should have poked at his past affairs instead of dredging up some old stuff someone else said.
7. Tiger has more fuel to crush him
Tiger is reknown for two things: his love of slutty white women and his competitive ferocity on the golf course. Where many men and women crack under the pressure of having to escape a bunker shot and salvage par and their tournament position Tiger does is like it’s Tuesday. At every tournament, the story isn’t who could beat Tiger. It’s if Tiger will win. That’s the presence his competitive edge demands.
No one knows what fuels him as he tends to be very tight-lipped about his personal mindset, but don’t think for one second the disdainful or condescending words and attitudes of his fellow competitors won’t end up being fuel to his fire. Bend to his hooks. Fairway shots to his drives. Birdie puts to his championships. Tiger grew up being shunned by people like Sergio. He will never forget.
Sergio, gleefully, looked the lion in the face and threw dirt in his eye. Good luck to him from here on out. Asshole.
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